Wednesday, March 31, 2004

Everyone. Leave some ghost prints?

As promised

Today i went to watch le papillon. It was great as expected. About a this old man and young girl. A different combination from all those useless hollywood films. I've had enough of Ben Stiller recently. I've had my fill. So anyway, you cannot believe how mignon the show is. It revolves around this old man searching for a butterfly called Isabelle and he has to travel quite a long distance every year to do so. Isabelle only appears once a year, for 10 days and the hill that it appears on is far far away. He wanted to collect it for his dead-disillousioned son, who's last wish was to get a papillon, the speices of Isabelle. Conicedently, his neighbour's daughter, who's not being paid enough attention to by her young 25 year old mother, goes on the trip with him. And she ruins the ALMOST accomplished attempt to catch the papillon. BUT in the end the Isabelle ends up at home. In a crystalis that no one ever named.

Which goes to show that what you are searching for isnt way out there. But in wherever you are.

You have just seen that my summary skills are NOT skills at all. but i didnt mean for it to be a summary. Good things should be shared! It is THAT awesome.

Today's philosophy lesson was fruitful. Waywayway great. Suddenly my perception of Miss Cheng changes ( : Like Shrek was gooood! Yeah today we discussed so many topics, didnt even touch the book. I think todays philo lesson was one of the better one's i've had. Oily, Holy Ghost. ( :

And today's chinese lesson we talked abt Rgs dating neighbourhood guys. What the main difference between neighbourhood schools and Rgs? Basically, we have discovered ourselves to our full potential and everyone was made different. No choice. I would have liked to be some modern Mozart or the girl version of Ian Torpe.. But i wasnt blessed with the abilites to so i'm living with it. I dont think i was blessed with much of any talents beside brains. I'm so nothing else without that.

And people laugh. Go on, if it makes you happy i dont see why i shouldnt play along. haha, very funny, laugh at me. If it makes you smile, go ahead. You dont much hurt my feelings anymore. You dont care. Your smiles and laughter are enough to make me happy. ( : Because i care about you.. Really. I'm trying. I'm being real. I dont mind if you form an anti-zeslene club or what, because if that makes you happy live it out. I wont sink or wallow in self-misery. I'll be proud. haha, i know you're all my friends[i hope] although i dont know if you'll be there for me[i hope you will]. i want to be there for you. ( : take this seriously. Dont laugh it off.

Oh yes, one more thing. She takes you for a toy, dont believe her. That's all i have for *****a's secondary school friends. If anyone followed her link here, believe me, i've know her for 6 years. And 6 year, is a LONG time. more than enough. 2 years, is already torture. But maybe she changed for the better. Although i'd much perfere she had changed for the worse.

Ghost prints s'il vous plait! ( : <3

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 9:19 pm

Friday, March 26, 2004

A((corn)): wait. i mean who you are is what you are but you arent who you are alone.
A((corn)): she is not WHO she is. she is WHAT she is. who you are is what you are but NOT vice-versa. its an easy concept to understand.
:zix: oh and seed never told you how to live your life, by the way. she merely commented on how you DO, or in this case, DID live your life.
:zix: HAH you said it yourself: who you are is WHAT you are.
:zix: and if you mean WHO she is in terms of identity, she is, simply put, seed.
:zix: AND what she is, IS who she is. because what she's made up of makes her up [duh] so it would mean it was HER. see. same difference
:zix: no you cant live the way she wants you to. it'd just be another pretence wouldn't it?
:zix: it WOULD be what you are if you agree. but that's beside the point.
:zix: and you can judge what she is by reading her blog?
A((corn)): ALSO, i want to know WHAT you are and not who. i want to know what you are made up of. i wouldnt have asked otherwise.
A((corn)): dont control the way i think..
A((corn)): i might just like being the way i am?its NATURAL for me to be uncomfortable[in your POV] with myself.otherwise, i am perfectly ohkay.
A((corn)): +intoo deep+ me? not me? i dont care abt that anymore. it was so yesterday? who i am is what i am AND if i listen to you that wouldnt be what i am anymore.
A((corn)): i cant live the way you want me to.
seed: ahh yesyes. not like you're PRETENDING though, just like you're so uncomfortable being yourself. not natural.
:zix: i think you try too hard to MAKE yourself something. like since you want to BE like this, you try so hard it comes of as pretence. ahhh abit difficult to explain.
seed: unless, of course, you only say it cos others are.
seed: it's abit like your mind controlling your character you know? because i am ~liek this, so i must ~speak like this, act like this, and so ~this would so suit my personality.
seed: maketh*. not to mention if YOU had adopted *diao~, you would have molded it into YOUR unique style.
seed: also, if you want to think in a 'clothes [words] maekth the man [person]' way, if a person adopts a word, then it'd prove her style right?
seed: pretend you find me immature. then say you also find Vanessa immature in the same way, and you'd think the words i used would suit her wouldn't you.
seed: i KNOW what you mean though, when you find how a word just SUITS that someone, but most of the time you're influenced by someone who actually USES that word too.
seed: oh yea i'm at your archives now, looking at your dec 30th entry: weird that you match words to people...
seed: i QUESTION your motive. you want to know more about me? haha yea i guess i would too. or do you want to know who i am FIRST.

------------------------------------------------------------------*
For those who missed it.

This sounds familiar? I'm trying to get on with my life here? you obviously want me to do smth abt it right? or else why comment at all?

What i DONT understand is: Cant you just take me for a normal person? You dont see these kind of posts on an average person's tagboard. I dunnoe. The way i live my life is fine to me. These ownership things? i am who i am/dont change me/you're not me/youare what you are/what you eat and so on? i cant care less for it anymore? cant care less ANYMORE. its the last straw. last straw. i'm living my life. adsolence? yeah. so?

you mimic others before you create your own style. got a problem? i dont mean to say you cant tag my board anymore. its amuses me half the time. lol. but now its not. it was funny. but is not now. its not.

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 11:34 am

Monday, March 22, 2004

I have come to a conclusion. After this E-learn week(where they pile assesments on us UGH) I will not come online unnesscarily. This also means that my loyal fans will not get their weekly dosage of Zeslene's blogging. Maybe i'll cut the medicine down to fortnighty.

Yes, i derive great joy from blogging. Everyday i'm always thing what to tell my readers.. What has made such a great impact on my life that it deserves to be recorded in the pages of this blog? As i was re-reading my past entries, I realized how much i've grown and how much i've not? I must credit much of this to Seed. Yeah. Thanks you were a great help. My blog entries did become lamer. After going thru my archives i was totally, "Wait, is that really ME?!"I was never that juvenile. But i was.. Yeah, who knows whether i can really act? I probably can.. But i couldnt fool myself this time. It was me alright..

I grew up even more during camp. Alot alot. I felt really close to God that period right after camp and i've drifted again. Drifting away.. Sigh.

Nono, i cant blame anyone for the way they think, no. I was just like that once.. I just have to face it that i dont owe people anyth. People dont owe me. I shouldnt want them to respond the way I would. That so wouldnt be them.. Even if it was me. I dont own anyone, i dont wish to. Cant i just face up to what IS reality. I cant not stand there and do nothing! i cant. [to quote HnG] "Sai's gone.." And my Sai? What is it? i know i've lost something.. I dunnoe what.. i'm seeking. One day i'll find. Promise!!

[Zeslene dont shed tears. its so not worth it!!]
Growing up and maturing does not mean losing your innonence. Would you really what to be ignorant? Maturing means becoming more innocent in a way. I hope it is.. Because that would be the ideal situation. But having your cake and eating it? i still have my cake[in my stomach].

You rescued me/*and lifted me up/*a living hope of grace revealed/*a live transformed in righteousness/*oh Lord You have rescued me/*Forgiving me/*You've healed my heart/*from sin and death/*You've brought me life/*You've made me whole/*oh Lord You have rescued me/*and You loved me before i knew you/*You knew me for all time/*i was created in Your image of Lord/*you've rescued me..

I've lost something. Death.. and i've been rescued!!

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 10:24 pm

Saturday, March 20, 2004

WHAT? Ethan has been voted out!!!

"I've never had my torch snuffed before, and it would be a different case if I went up there and had my torch snuffed for reasons that I could have controlled. Now, tonight, I had no control over what happened. I fought to the bitter end. I was trying to strike a deal with Lex seconds before he voted. I had a feeling I was going, and I went to every person in my tribe today and said, "Listen, do you want to go this way, or this way, think about the future." I tried.

"It's not my style to give up, ever, not until the very end, not until my fire was put out. I feel very proud of the way I played, and I feel happy that I played the game my way. I didn't conform to any other ways of playing, I didn't change my style, I didn't change myself. I played the way Ethan plays, and I made it 21 days, halfway, toughest SURVIVOR ever. I made it further that any other winner, and that I'm proud of.

"In AFRICA, I didn't receive one vote against me the entire time I was out there. During ALL-STARS, it's a little different. I saw my name a couple of times. Each time you see your name, you feel that little punch in your gut, that little dropped stomach. I've squeaked by the past couple times, but this time, it hurts. It's frustrating. I still want to be out there playing the game. It hurts. I'd do anything to be back out there. I don't want this game to end; I love the game.

"The first time I played this game, I was lucky enough to find an alliance. The first time I played this game, I was lucky enough to find some guys I could trust, and I could rely on them. This time around, it was totally opposite. I was alone the entire game, and I had to play a much more proactive, aggressive game, which I can do. I still played it my way: I didn't lie; I didn't cheat. I'm going home with my dignity and self-respect, and that I'm happy about.

"What frustrates me is that there are some people still in the game that I feel are not worthy of remaining in this game. They're taking a spot which I feel I deserve. Everyone has their own way of playing the game, and there's no right way. But there is some comfort in knowing that I tried my hardest, I did my best, I fought and fought to the bitter end. There's really nothing I can do. If I had found out, okay, I was going to be getting voted off, and I just sit on it and say, "All right, I'm getting voted off," then I'd have to live with that. But here, you know, I'm proud of myself, my family will be proud, my father will be proud.

"It's a good feeling knowing that you went out on top. No one will ever be able to take away the fact that I won SURVIVOR: AFRICA. That's my title, and for me, that's a good feelling. There's a little bit of relief knowing that I came into this game and I'd still leave with the title of SURVIVOR: AFRICA champion. So I do my best, I try my hardest, and if I won, fantastic! If I didn't, I did my best, and I've still got SURVIVOR: AFRICA under my belt. I thought many times, "Leave when you're at the top, don't come back for that last heavyweight battle, leave when you're at the top. Leave when you're at your best. Don't come out of retirement and try to do it again and look silly." That's not in my nature. I'm a competitor through and through, and to be part of this challenge, to be part of this ALL-STARS is an honor.

"I obviously did something well enough my first time around where they invited me back. They asked me back to play again, and that's an honor, and I'm not going to turn that down. But the mind games, the torture to your body…it's only 39 days, that's as long as it can possibly last. I can set my mind to that, and that's a piece of cake for me, that's a piece of cake for me. The spark and the thrill and the joy that I get from playing this game that got me up each morning. Competing against the best of the best. I'll never get a chance to do that again, and I would never turn that chance down."

NONONONO. Why Ethan? why ethan.. Why did they have to vote him out? whywhywhy? Min er and i are veh angry at those 'mogo mogo dumbos'[as Meaner aptly puts them] I dont understand their atitude. Never will. But ethan did well. (( : love him. (( :

And he has to have sucha cute face and sweet heart.

i heart ethan.

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 10:16 am

Thursday, March 18, 2004

Ah , the times ma and Cordelia shared. So fun.. Yet so far away.



Of course.. There's also all of them!!

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 5:32 pm

Wednesday, March 17, 2004

i want to be that eagle.

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 6:32 pm

Tuesday, March 16, 2004

I'm becoming to tender now. Its like its not really Zeslene anymore you know. Its NOT.. Can't really be me. I'm never that emotional. I'm not that... diverse!! I dunnoe.. i know i'm not..

Sometimes i really feel its a blessing to be able to not attach yourself emotionally to people that easily, you dont have to waste time worrying about them, and that in itself i think is this big accomplishment for me, honest. Try as i might there always that sense of i-dont-want-to-love-you-beacuse-it-hurts kind of thing. Then there are these times when i know that being able to be a friend to so many people is really awesome because you know they'll just really be there. always. But i dunnoe.. I try. Really.. try to give my best to all these people i know need love. In the end all i get is just plain ingratitude and not being there when i need them. its these times i just so dont want friendship. Dont need it! its just these unneseccary frils hindering my life. All i've ever done is try to be a person you can trust.. I trust you, but you dont deserve it.

I cant put what i'm feeling now into words. but i'm trying. i'm trying.. I need this outlet for my emotions. Feel too desperate. And i cant vent it on God, it not right.. its not even what He wants me to do. i dunnoe just that in the end it all comes back to God. Philo, love... everyth! Then everyth just seems so useless, ain't it? I want to grow up.. grow up meaning mature. Dont want to be this adsolent juvenile person.. There's so much more to me than you can see. And maybe i've realized, that in the foolishness of other i can see wisdom. Or what? I guess it was just me not opening my eye.. Me making assumptions about that person. REally, has philo class not taught me anything at all. Suddenly i realize that who am i fit to judge? I suffer from all these miss-understanding[pun] too.

Last night i was asleep very late. Thinking about misery and what not.. Then i thought that pain is really self-inflicted.. So many people i know slashing. I just dont understand! What so sadistic to be about? You have to realize that you need to love yourself and your body before you can fully say 'I love' so and so. It would just be to hypocritical to do otherwise. And if you dont have respect for yourself not, you definitely dont deserve respect from me..

Pain is self-percived.. What about qualities? You cant say I am intelluctual or I'm funky if everyone else doesnt think so. You just cant. That's what society is made of and i finally realize why i was so angry at it that day. What makes this Zeslene you know up? I cant just say what i am to your face right. Not when you dont see that aspect of what i said in me. This is especially apparent in personaity quizzes where they want who to describe yourself. Most probably you'll get someone to describe yourself for you.. That because who you are is not what you think you are but what others think of you. And boy is that infurating.

I know i shouldnt expect others to do what i want them to do if i dont do it myself first. I told you.. Everything still comes back to God again.. thankfully.*feels much better after letting it all out..

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 6:36 pm

I'm so blown away!! Haha, had i known it would be so easy to get si pei to help me do it i'd have done it like so much eariler!! (( : haha.

So now you see the awesome picture! Weet. thank you thank you Si pei!! haha. Did i tell you that you were a genius? Theres so much to blog about so little time to.

And this i say solemly: i will blog abt all those sad stuff later because i'm still on a high mood now. hehh.

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 3:50 pm

Monday, March 15, 2004

BUSINESSMAN
(Dominant Extrovert Concrete Thinker )

Like just 3% of the population you are a BUSINESSMAN (DECT). Hide the children and protect the bunnies, basically. In ancient times you would be a deadly barbarian. These days, you're perfect for Wall Street. You prefer concrete thinking to a more creative style, and your direct modes of thought and action help you succeed in whatever you may try to accomplish.

Your forceful and outgoing personality can make you seem like a hothead, but because your mind ultimately rules your heart you rarely let your emotions get in the way of your goals. By the way, think of Genghis Kahn buying seven million pork bellies on the trading market, and then eating half of them, and you have yourself. Good luck.

Interesting facts about the PERSONALITY TEST:

9,817,011 people have taken TheSpark's Personality Test.
41% of them are male, 59% of them are female.
The most common personality type is the Guru (SEAF).
The rarest is the Businessman (DECT). Only 3% of all test takers fall into that category.
Women prefer Shakespeare.

Check out your results!

Haha, by the way, i chose albert einstein over shakesphere. Mann, you must take the tests really. Oh man thanks so much chelsia for the webby, i love it! ((((( : Hehh. Tmr we are going to eat lunch together after squash. *squeeses chelsia. Haha..

Today Olivia told me that tofu goes to her church and i was like huh. I mean, what the.. is the world really that small?! haha, i'm being spastic. Yay. (( : Back to doing quizzes. Must try must try! Good things must share right chelsia..

Oh and the stupid research studies which i was planning to do but never mind thats me anyway..

And one more thing: some one trry to convice yi yun that =] is really ugly and she should really use (( : instead. haha. no larh. it looks okay. BE ORIGINAL! yay! ((: call me lame. Be truthful. today i'm hyper cuz of the quizzes hehh.

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 10:06 pm

Frankly i feel that there's smth wrong with me these days but hell. haha. Just took a test i obtained from chelsia's blog. Here are the results.

The Wild Rose
Random Brutal Love Dreamer (RBLDf)

Colorful, but unpicked. You are The Wild Rose.

Prone to bouts of cynicism, sarcasm, and thorns, you excite a certain kind of man. Hoping to gather you up, he flirts and winks and asks you out, ultimately professing his love. Then you make him bleed. Why? Because you're the rare, independent, self-sufficient kind of woman who does want love, but not from a weakling.

You don't seem to take yourself too seriously, and that's refreshing. You aren't uptight; you don't over-plan. Romance-wise, sex isn't a top priority--a true relationship would be preferable. For your age, you haven't had a lot of bonafide love experience, though, and this kind of gets to core of the issue. You're very selective.

The problem is them, not you, right? You have lofty standards that few measure up to. You're out there all right, but not to be picked up by just anyone.

"You're never truly single as long as you have yourself."

Guys, now you know.. This test is amazingly accurate! Oh mann! Give it a shot here!

I'm on may way to take somemore of those tests. And really, just plainly wasting my time. but who cares? ((( :

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 9:48 pm

Sunday, March 14, 2004

I think and therefore i am

Hmm, since like my raking up of this statement has caused some ripples? I dunnoe. Felt the craze when i was searching for interesting webbies to waste my precious time on. Haha, got that and now its in my msn nick.. Trying to be a quack and pass of as some all rounded wise man. haha.. if you want to be wise go read up on it here! (((:

I've been blogging so much these days i think i should just plan my timetable here.. But not now anyway. Too bored to do such wu liao stuff.

Edited.

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 2:37 pm

Saturday, March 13, 2004

Was re-reading audrey's blog and saw that post abt primary sch and how much she missed but cant remember it. Yeah, that post if youcare to go read it.. And its really that sad now that i'm suberby missing everything and anything about olgc.. And since everyone is so caught up in the poetry craze i shall add my fair bit! ( :

When i think back on these times
and the dreams we've left behind
i'm just glad that i was blessed with you
to have you in my life
when things are not looking up
remember its human that you are
perfection isnt in reach
dont push yourself too far

time has flown ahead
but your heroism is in my mind
you save me from the keep
blinded my fault in your eyes
you were the bridge
when troubled waters loomed
and from beginning to end
you held me thru

i promised i'll be there
in spirit and in hope
when you feel the tide
swallowing
just remember it goes back
and i'll help you push it too

yours truly. signed and sealed. Zeslene

Chatting with May and Cher online. Ah, its so relishing those times we sat arnd and talked abt who knows what. and it so rocked. Just like now. Animal farm still rears the animals. And ostrich(aka zeslene) boluders! wahahaha. ( : ( : ( : (: ( : ( :

but secondary school life rocks as much tho.

yuan:
firstly i do not look like a guy,
no way!!
and art Polio
was hiliarous. haha

natasha:
you sure your computer crashed!

and lastly:
you know 109, your hadley cheer is really despo
i love you
you love me
hadley will get victory
with a great big muacK and a wah ffrom me to you
wont you say we're winners too?

its like i kiss you and suck up to you then you let us win k? so loser. think of a better one larh. haha

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 12:07 pm

Friday, March 12, 2004

In the 17th century, the French philosopher René Descartes came up with the "explanation for it all": "I think, therefore I am". I remember this statement being the source of debates in philosophy classes. It was the existential "which came first" story… the chicken or the egg.

Years later, I feel that his statement really is a fill-in-the-blanks statement. "I think _________, therefore I am _____________." In other words, "I think I am angry, therefore I am angry." "I think I am tired, therefore I am tired." "I think I am busy, therefore I am busy."

Now before your mind starts objecting to these statements, let's take a closer look. Maybe an example from my life might help explain. This morning as I got up, I thought about all the things I have to do today, and realized it's going to be a very busy day. So my thought was something like "I have too much to do today." I then thought about my garden and how I like to take a stroll through the garden in the morning and check out the new growth, and see who needs watering. My next thought, of course, since the previous thought had been about being too busy, was that I had no time to take a walk in the garden this morning since I had "too much to do".

Extract take from somewhere when i was reading up on the statement: i think therefore i am.

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 9:44 pm

I'm currently watching survivior, and feeling tenderness at seeing mogo mogo's lost.. Why did they ask ethan? ah. Too bad the guy is co cute. haha.. And anyway jerri is going to be voted out, i guess, so i dont have to worry for ethan. ( :

Philo seen a decrease in interest from your's truly. i so cannot stand it anymore. Esp with such and idiotic teacher. gosh. Philo use to be interesting but ever seince miss wong left, i'm like so alone in philo. Its so now a lesson, no more that fun community of enquiry. But i shouldnt be so vulgar here. Singapore is supposed to be democratic. So we can have freedom of speech? But no, some teacher who has too thin skin has booked some girl who bitched about a teacher on her blog. So rafflesians, dont offend anyone on your blog. in any case +104 teachers rock!! ( :

I'm going frission all over now seeing Ethan! nevermind mogo mogo.. when there are winners there are losers. be a good loser and be glad! ( :

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 8:57 pm

Thursday, March 11, 2004

While by beloved brother is occupying the toliet, i shall just take out a few minutes to pen down some of my little thoughts.. ( :

No one likes to listen to others complains right? But its exactly what i find in everyone's blog. Them just pouring out their whole.. And its just like talking to someone one the phone.. Someone who's just saying how bad their life is.. how bitter the sugar in their plantations are.. blah blah. Everything just gets so heavy on you.. But in a blog you dunnoe who's reading it, so it just gives some form of excuse i guess. Blogs are really attention seeking. Don't ask me why i still keep one though.. Maybe to share my life's experiences with others? Or just for the sake of letting others be kpo? I dunnoe. Maybe all i want is some outlet for my emotions.. Since i cant draw. People say that drawing is the bestform of expression, but i wasnt blessed with that awesome skill of art.

Sigh, sometimes iwich i wasnt so lacking in all this. I'm really devoid of talents.. Talk about poetry. I just do very shallow ones. i cant do sports.. Cant do art.. Cant do much, not even write awesome stuff.. i'm just failing to see the special thing God put in me.. But then God created everyone in His image, so all these inforiety complexes are just rubbish to Him. Things that dont stand of much i guess.. Because one day we'll all be judged in the same way.

Case for Christ is a really swell book. If have time please read it! ( : It just shows you why all the more you should believe and trust in Jesus. Just read the chapter which says that you are not the center of the world. God is.. So for all the trials and tribulations we have to go thru.. We should just rejoice for another day. Be happy in Christ. He came down to save us and i believe. I believe He died for my sins.

You all must be bored with all this preachy stuff? Haha.. Tmr is swim carn.. Yay, a day off from school. Ol has sports day tmr, i cant go, sadly! ah sigh. Tests are all over, this is smth to cheer about. Currently adapting to secondary school life well..

haha, brother is out and i need to study. more soon. ( :

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 8:27 pm

Saturday, March 06, 2004

Today was founders day. Mann, my shoulder still aches after Kuo ying and Si pei made me hit yuan so hard!! Hope her shoulder is painful too. And i'm too weak to resist KY and SP. Haha.. actually arh i also got some fen.. So now my shoulder aching partly my fault too. eeps. ( :

Went out for street E today. Felt really small in that big swamp of people at j8. Really, it was that crowded. I saw some rgsers and Brandon too walking aimlessly. Wanted to go up and share to Brandon but i was with Jas, so to walk away would be too impolite. Althought i did walk away eventually, was feeling too bored to listen anymore. And then i felt so so so bad for not going up to Brandon and sharing.. he seemed really down. But no, i do not have a soft spot for him..

Then after street E went for dinner with the Yfers at Mos burger. They're visiting Germaine now. Really hope she's feeling alright and then i can see her at Yf next week! ( : Natasha please dont forget!!!

Just came back and the television is switched on. Its channel 22 and i'm trying to listen to the commentators comments. Haha.. Face it all manu fans, its getting increasingly hard ofr manu now. This is badddd.

And just like everyone else, i'm in a not-too-good mood. On account that i'm feeling really tired (loads of work to do still) and well.. *cant say this.

fulham scored. I'm so pissed with manu now.

Wes brown. dont make anymore mistakes PLEASE.

ps, if i sound whiny, dont take it to heart. everyths just enveloping me..

pps MANU SCORED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GO RUUD!!!! i'm now ( : haha. so tempremental.

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 8:57 pm

I am so elated!

Thankyou audrey for helping me do up this picture! ( : Oh no, she says she cant view it. wAh! oh no.. wasted my time again. And the picture is really so so SO nice..

Today was founders day. Quite cool!
Will blog about it soon, but i'm too hungry to do so now.

I'm going to lunch and will be back well, dunnoe when larh.

Tell me if you can see the pic!!

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 12:32 pm

Wednesday, March 03, 2004

I'm searching for hosts now to well, host my images. As of now 5.31pm march 3, 2004, you probably cant see the nice picture of a mirage that i have put up.

its still too bigg also. so there.. i have so great web designing skills. Thanks you Jiayun. Without your erhh. (little)*there is no sarcasm in this* help, this blog would look not as nice as it will after i complete this. But somewhere in the near future all your effort and well, mine will go to waste as i will be my not unusual dissastisfied self, and change the template again. But all this changement*french will take place apres a very long time! lala.

I'm unusually hyper today. So i may have looked more pretty! = ) haha. Its great when i'm contente. (french and english do not go well as we can see. but oh hell. =P)
Right now, i'm listening to the great 'every promise' cd. its very <"font size : 12">very very! nice. I dont know why.. but the lyrics are all meaningful*unlike some hillsongs.. although the tune is weird, but who does care abt tune much? its the words that matter. *hear that those hillsongs? haha. Are you people reading this getting bored? or fustrated. I'm so inmature. Hello zeslene, you're thirteen. noinoi. I seem like a what. eleven. Bet you some 11s are much more mind developed than yours truly. But hell with it. ee. i'm being vulgur and philistine. !!! save me. -> i mean this in an amusing sense. [l a m e r]

okay. just got into village photos. *dont scream jiayun. haha. Geog preformance task is well, hard. I cant write anyth abt yuan here.. because erh. So eccentric of me. Besides i'm so weird*this is like the dunnoe what time i'm typing it. darned vocab!!! Anyway, i shall not stray. I've been online for so long already. die die. And then there's chinese test tmr.. Like thank you everyth is summative or else for all these tests sure fail. But also, why must we take the Os for chinese? xD. Truth is i prefer the O levels. I'm a mugger, so mugging is my kind. Todays habit of mind is thinking flexibily so must go bend my mind a little bit. Bit by bit.. Then one day sure have enough muscles to do gymastics. yay!

village photos CMI. with a not at the end of the C. free is not a word in the world's vocad. dammit! fine. i shall you the fan photo first. and i guess imagestation is still the best, maybe apart from the url jiayun gave me, but never mind.

Random tune: Hold on when you feel like letting go. There's a hero if only you'll see.

i hope the picture turns out fine. au revior humans. might be back not so hyper later. mood swings are drastic now.

prayer;praise;promises`_____ 5:56 pm